Last night I performed at the Contemporary Jewish Museum’s Festival of Rights party. Shout-out to my boy Dan Wolf for making it happen, and for letting me rock some new material in the shmancy space. SOOOO…just in time for the 4th night of Chanukah (aka holy hump-day), I present to you good people some facts and creative non-fictions of this great holiday.

The best (worst?) part was that I also performed this piece on Friday at the Youth Speaks open mic, and of the hundred teenagers laughing in the audience…a good 30-40% definitely did not get that it was a joke. I had at least five folks come up to me afterwards and wish me a “happy Chanookah…wait, wait, did I pronounce it right, Josh?”

On that note, happy Challah-days to all my friends, fam, and even you, Bill O’Reilly. If you do end up winning your War for Christmas, Bill, there’s only one thing I can say to you: Mazel Tov.